Tips #1

Do you feel the sudden urge to start working?

Don't rush off to a hospital and don't worry, THE ART & SCIENCE OF PROCRASTINATION has your back.

• Create a list of what you're thinking needs to get done. Making tangible just how much effort you'll need to expend to accomplish everything will help clarify how disagreeable even beginning to try would be. Next, tear up the list you made and put it in the trash, or merely let it fall from your fingers onto whatever you happen to be standing or lying over at the time
• Don't be too tough on yourself when it comes to deadlines. For example, if you assign all the tasks you need to get done deadlines well beyond your life expectancy, you can make a reasonable assumption that you'll be long dead before you even need to get started on anything
• One thing you can't procrastinate if you're going to become a proficient procrastinator is excuse making. For example, excuses such as, "I didn't finish the project on time because my mom died of cancer", and, "Oh, is there a dead body in my house? I didn't notice it because I fell off a roof when I was ten and lost my sense of smell" are best made in advance to promote believability. Note: be sure not to claim the same family member died of cancer more than once

If you enjoyed those tips, you can read more at the Chuurch of Apathy.